My first Sunday in rehab. Separated from my wife and family and put out here with a bunch of alcoholics and addicts. The Saturday Family group session was tough and I was quite sure that I couldn't handle this.
Well the song fit me this morning. They call it a dry drunk. You haven't had anything to drink but was experiencing the same feelings as being drunk. Here I was this fine Sunday morning. Running out of clean clothes, not shaving, wondering what in the hell I am doing here and feeling mighty lonesome. I was surrounded by people that I didn't know telling horror stories about their lives that I really didn't want to hear. I had been telling everyone I was an alcoholic in group for 3 days and I didn't believe it. I felt terrible. I was clinging to memories of just a week ago, trying to forget where I was at. Felt like I was in the middle of a nightmare and just wanted to wake up.
Sunday's are pretty relaxed at rehab. Today family members can take the patients out for a 4 hour time period away from the rehab. I didn't qualify to leave today because it was my first Sunday. Little did I know at that time that I would never leave on a family day pass. Rough time with family members is on the horizon. They just kind of left me there. There would be a reason but I wouldn't find out until much later.
This Sunday morning I was feeling bad. Hung over (dry drunk) and feeling lonesome. I had started on the roller coaster emotions of rehab and things would get much worse before they started to get better.
Mike
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